RvBTO: Day 1

For those that don't know, RvBTO is a gathering of Red vs. Blue fans in the beautiful Canadian city of Toronto.  Some might ask, "why go to Canada to celebrate a series that's made in Austin?"  To those people I have the following two reasons:

1) Shut up.
2) Fuck you.

Now then, my trip this year started with flight to Detroit and the meeting of the first members of my party, Vicki (slvrwhispr) and Jon (k1l3rman).  After picking me up from the airport, we went to a coney place to meet with the rest of our group.  Apparently "coney" is Michigander for "diner".  We soon met up with many internet superstars, such as Cory (1984), Zak (zotaku87), Manda, (_Fire_Ball_), Larry (DSchneider) and Travie (TravieYak).  Fun was had, onion rings were eaten, and normal folk were freaked the fuck out.  :D 

After an awesome visit, said our goodbyes to Cory who would sadly not be coming with us, and told Zak and Travie that we'd soon see them in TO.  The rest of us, Larry, Vicki, Jon, and Manda, went to Wal-Mart, to get snacks and a copy of Blazing Saddles for the car's DVD player, and then to the party store for noise makers and last minute costume additions for our Bring Your Own Band performance.  Also, apparently "party store" has another meaning in Michigan, so again we those of us from further south were confused as hell.  It must be the proximity to Canada.  Yup, gotta be.  Speaking of the party (supply) store, I also acquired what later become the infamous Banhammer!  I saw it, and it immediately felt right.  This hammer would find itself in the hands of many of the other mods and admins for the site, as well it should have.

Photo by Amanda Lemmond

We set out for Toronto much later than I'd anticipated, but we were still on schedule to arrive that night with some time for hanging out.  We crossed the border, encountering the HOTTEST CANADIAN BORDER AGENT EVAR along the way, and after a harrumph-filled car ride, soon found ourselves in the magical city of Toronto.  After consulting with the rest of my group, I trekked to downtown one my own, buying the Five Subway Tokens of Destiny at the Kipling station.  The First Subway Token of Destiny was spent getting to Bloor station, where I headed to street level and started walking south. 

Here's the thing about the subway.  They put a lot of time, effort, and money into building it for a reason.  Here I thought I could walk from Bloor to Dundas and the Imperial Pub about as fast as it would take me to wait for and hop onto the southbound train for two stops.  I'd never been more wrong, and the Second Subway Token of Destiny was recklessly but aptly spent to get from the College station to Dundas. 
This was a costly mistake, as I missed Ryan (Abandoned), Britte (Brittewater), and Barbara (Blawndee) at the pub.  I was bummed, but was soon delighted to see people like Jeff (Jeff), John (RocketWhore), Chris (Spamman4587), Chris (deathbyoi), Chris (knives_kill), Amy (Fienne), Charlie (flim_geek), Dan (DangerousDan), Caleb (caleb), Matt (PeteZahut666), Joe (Microbe), and many others.  Merriment was had, and I managed to drunkenly catch the last train home thanks to the Third Subway Token of Destiny.
My night didn't end there.  Upon reaching the Islington station, I realized that I still needed to traverse the 8 km north to my hotel and the rest of my party.  Fortunately I remembered that Vicki had mentioned a 24-hour bus line that runs along Islington.  Just as she said, a bus eventually showed up at the stop not far from the subway station, and I caught it home.  But my night was still not over. 

photo by Matt Bailey

See, I'd forgotten that I'd actually need a key to get into my room.  Not a problem, I thought, I just wake up my roommate Larry and he'll let me in!  I knocked on the door.  No answer.  I knocked some more.  No answer.  I texted, and heard a beep on the other side of the door.  I have the right room at least, I thought to myself, so I'm almost there.  I called, and heard a very loud ringtone on the other side of the door, but no answer.  Well shit, I thought, I guess I'm going to have to sleep right here in the hall.  I settled in, and before I drifted off to sleep a hotel worker spotted me.  She was very nice, and after explaining my predicament and providing enough information, she gave me a key to the room.  I got in, chided Larry for sleeping like the dead, and myself finally went to sleep.

This was only the first day.